Choosing when to leave an abusive relationship

When you love someone so much it hurts, it is a dangerous thing. It is wrong because you allow so many terrible things to happen to you that you wouldn't normally put up with. Why do you allow yourself to fall so utterly and completely in love with someone who hurts you and your well being? Being physically and verbally abused is something so many women have endured. Why do women allow themselves to be hurt by men like this?

A man who is an alcoholic will throw out so much abuse to his partner and feel guilty about it the next day. But it is never enough to keep him from taking that next drink. Why do women live their lives around men who are so selfish and who like to drink themselves into oblivion, even drinking their lives away and any chance of a future together?

Women need to find a way out of this cycle of abuse and stop living for a man. Yes, you don't want to be alone and you want a good man who will take care of you. But you so oftentimes end up settling for the wrong man and then taking care of him and putting up with him and his many faults and addictions.

Is it that you fall totally and completely in love with the idea of trying to nurture him back to health, changing him along the way? Or do you really believe that your love is stronger than his addictions?

The never-ending cycles of love/hate relationships have ruined so many people's lives. You will grow cold and bitter by the time you find someone who will treat you right. Many good women have been ruined by men like this. The abusive men have instilled in you a hatred so deep that you do not trust anymore.

As that trust fades, you begin to do things that embarrass you, like out-of-control rage, but you cannot help yourself. Your mind starts to play tricks on you and you begin to fight and argue and do anything to save your relationship. You'll even try to change your partner by telling them that they're going to lose you if they don't change their ways, but it is never enough. You are fighting a losing battle most of the time.

Finally, you have had enough and decide it is time to move on. Your heart has become so involved that it is telling you no, when you know it is the right thing to do. You will go through months of heartache, tears, and longing for someone that was never right for you in the first place. The pain of letting go is unbearable, but you keep trying to be strong and leave. Once you've left, your mind and heart play tricks on you, telling you that there could still be hope.

But there is no hope, you have to move on and find yourself again. You have to learn to love yourself again and learn from your mistakes. Most importantly, you have to keep yourself from getting into another hopeless relationship. So many women have dated and even married the same type of men they had just left, who have alcohol or drug addictions and are abusive. You have to get out of this cycle and look for men who will treat you right. Look for men who don't drink or do drugs. Find a good, hard working man who wants what you want and has the same interests as you. No matter what, don't give up and don't give in and go back. Save your love for a man who deserves it.